Can summer break couples?

The summer period has arrived and with it begins a stage, sometimes truly relevant for many couples, who see the summer vacations as a time of coexistence and personal dedication. But this period can also result in a deterioration of the relationship, either by the failure to meet expectations, sometimes too high, or simply for not managing to combine both individual personalities with life together.

Beware! High expectations, risk in crescendo

Organizing a vacation together is a bonding moment for many couples that helps to find common ground, harmonizes tastes and interests of both and creates paradisiacal expectations that take them out of the daily routine. This is something that, without a doubt, many couples coordinate with enough time to leave everything tied up and thus better cope with the day-to-day work and daily responsibilities.

The problem comes when expectations about this vacation activity are too high. Any new experience that people live is qualified in one way or another according to our previous impressions and perspectives that we have already built up months ago.

Something similar happens with vacations. A hard winter of work and little contact can lead to an overly wonderful perception of summer and, with it, an ever-increasing risk of disappointment. As with movies or music, an overly positive review or recommendation can often generate an interest that in reality is not achieved. Creating realistic expectations is the best recommendation to enjoy without being overwhelmed by circumstances and happily accept the possibility that not everything goes as planned.

Good communication is essential

As a couple we must always respect certain rules of mutual respect that allow us to give in and expose our arguments without generating banal discussions that do not lead to any port. We must always find common ground, whether to organize or enjoy a vacation together, or for matters of greater relevance and future importance. As linguistic beings we must value the power of language to allow things to happen and for both of us to design a satisfactory future.
Expressions such as “Your father is unbearable” can be replaced by “In my opinion I think your father is unbearable”. From fact to opinion

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Conversing fluently, listening twice as much as you speak and expressing ideas, opinions and, above all, discomfort, is a good way to correct mistakes, change attitudes and favor a good atmosphere during coexistence. Avoid judgments, which always say more about those who make them than about those to whom they are made, and which genuinely reflect the human soul. Making judgments as a lesson turns your arguments into indisputable and inflexible facts, in the face of a dissenting but totally respectable opinion.

Look for your life plan together

It is to look at the long term, but without losing focus on the day to day. Two people who love and appreciate each other should always have dreams in sight, projects to do and trips to make, together and separately, and in both cases show each other support and affection. Summer can be a good time to lay the foundations of this plan for the future and to start a healthy and happy cohabitation.

For this it is also important to keep affective exchanges alive, and not only when we refer to sex. Compliments and compliments at unexpected moments keep the fun, playfulness and pleasure of being together, feeling loved and valued by someone. Filling the joint current account with affection is on the same level as filling it financially, but in the first case it is an investment that has a return with interest.

The activities in common, programmed with time and in an exciting way, as the summer vacations, form a plan to take advantage of every moment together. Always respecting the individual space of each one, this summer will be very close to being the one of your dreams. Even if the reality is always even better.